jealous for me

He is jealous for me,
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realise just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.

And oh, how He loves us so,
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us all

Yeah, He loves us,
Oh! how He loves us,

Oh! how He loves us,
Oh! how He loves.

We are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,
If His grace is an ocean, we're all sinking.
And Heaven meets earth like an unforseen kiss,
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
I don't have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about, the way

He loves us,

He loves us,

Oh! how He loves us,

Oh! how He loves us,
Oh! how He loves.

I'm sitting here overwhelmed by the greatness of God's love for me, my life, every detail, my family, my friends, the way that He takes care of the very things that need to be done, the undeserving gift of life, encountering the love of God this much...so tangible...so beautiful...so undone...so merciful...so overwhelming...so changing...transforming...so full of wonder... joy!

I pray that you find this encounter too. Check out the song "How He Loves" and embrace the power of the Love of our Great God!!

Called...oh His goodness

"We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose"
(Romans 8:28, NIV)

Isn't it good to know that God is working behind the scenes in your life, today? No matter what you may be facing, no matter what trial you may be going through, God has a plan to turn things around in your favor. You are called according to His purpose; so right now, He is working out a plan for your good. Right now, He is orchestrating the right people to come across your path. He is orchestrating the right opportunities to open up to you. You may not see it in the natural, but look with your eyes of faith today. Show your love for the Father by your obedience to His Word. Come before Him with an open and humble heart trusting that He is guiding you. Keep standing. Keep believing. Keep hoping. Keep declaring His Word and meditate on His goodness, knowing that He rewards the people who seek after Him.



A PRAYER FOR TODAY
Heavenly Father, thank You for Your faithfulness in my life. Thank You for working all things together for my good. Give me Your strength and peace today and fill me with Your faith which overcomes the world. In Jesus' Name. Amen.

I love the crispness of fall on my hammock with Jesus!

Psalm 5:11-12

11 But let all who take refuge in you rejoice;
let them ever sing for joy,
and spread your protection over them,
that those who love your name may exult in you.
12 For you bless the righteous, O Lord;
you cover him with favor as with a shield.

what MIGHT BE?

PRUNING-PURGING-BREAKING UP: The beginning of fall… as I look back at coming off summer assignment, there was an overwhelming sense of what’s next. We went full swing into leadership weekend, which was a sweet time to love on and cast vision to our leaders. In the midst of changing it up a bit, “breaking up the fallow ground” (from Hosea), I believe that for a moment I was hesitant. I wasn’t sure what that process would look like. I was discouraged at some leaders who stepped off our team. If I was truly honest, I would say that I felt attacked and questioning how this was a reflection of my leadership. Andy and I walked through this and I was allowed to see the beauty in the “breaking up fallow ground” and let go of this urge to fix it or question what went wrong…but truly experience God’s hand in this purging. I thought about the vine and branches in John 15 and how the vinedresser prunes the branches that aren’t bearing fruit. I will say that I have moved past this discouraging feeling as God has again returned being faithful as always. And am looking forward to what might be, rather than what went wrong.

A TIMID LEADER-FRUIT ABOUNDS:

So LHS has a team of 3, including myself. Suzanne doesn’t’ have Young Life experience and last semester really just stood back and observed. Due to our decrease in leaders on our team, Suzanne was a little nervous to what ministry would look like for our team. At our first team meeting I shared out of the first chapter of Acts. A small band of disciples, waiting out of a sense of abandonment from their Master, and then came a charge. “You will go into all of Samaria, Judea and the ends of the earth.” What a challenge! I wondered what that must of felt like. I remember hearing Suzanne say, “The whole world…and we are just having to conquer a small little high school with 800 kids.” At our first “club” event: Glow in the Dark Dodge ball, it was just Suzanne and I because DC had to go to a funeral. It was such an awesome night. 29 kids. Glow paint. Glow sticks! Afterwards, we go to Sonic to hang out. Suzanne and I were standing talking and a parent of two freshmen girls came to pick them up. Immediately, as the girls walked away to leave, Suzanne exclaimed, "Bye Summer and Kirsti!!” The face of the mother lit up at the acknowledgement of their child's name. She knew their names. She remembered. She reached out. She was Jesus to those girls and maybe their mother. I was extremely proud of her. She challenged herself to step out of her comfort zone and to be known and to know these girls. She may have been the only person that exclaims their name with such love and joy. I know that if the fallow ground had not been broken up, there wouldn’t have been a need for Suzanne to step up and get out of her box. There is fruit in the midst of the broken ground and I am excited to see what begins to grow!

breaking and sowing

"Sow for yourselves righteousness,

reap the fruit of unfailing love,

and break up your fallow ground;

for it is time to seek the Lord,

until he comes and showers righteousness on you."

Hosea 10:12

MUDFEST 2010

Words can't express the craziness of this night...150 kids...a mud pit...finding mud in your ears weeks after the night...laughing...and embracing that you probably won't recover fully from the madness of the night...I think that is the purpose. A night to kick off the Young Life club semester!! Momentum. Excitement. Wildness.

Running the ball...

Battle of the Bridge...Loudon tradition. Pep Rally. Helping Ms. Haun (the cheerleading coach). Taking pictures. Laughing. Smiling. Excitement and anticipation of facing the greatest rivalry in town. Lenoir City vs. Loudon.

They started "RUNNING THE BALL" tradition in 1996. The opposing side runs the ball from their school to the game. It's about 8 miles from one school to the other. The track team, the cheerleaders and then whoever else wants to ride the bus behind the runners. The bus drives slow enough and stops to let those who are tired and need a break. I got to ride the bus...what an honor.

The score of the game you ask? Loudon dominates!

Learn to cast...

I went with a friend one afternoon to learn how to fly fish...On the trip up my attention was caught by Bald River Falls on the Tellico River. Of course, I didn't want to do just take in the beauty of the falls, but to experience it. So we walked around to the other side of the falls and then climbed up the side of it- straight up through the rainforest. And of course I wanted to walk out on the fall. When we were up there we discovered there was another fall to the right of it.

Fly fishing...only a few words to describe this experience. I was getting the hang of climbing over rocks and fallen trees and walking through the flowing river- keeping my balance while holding my pole. Learning to cast my line takes patience. Every time I have got my line caught in the trees, my friend caught a fish. It was a fun day. I was sore the next day- who would of thought?!

First time at camp...my mom and dad

“Facing the Mirror”

After my parents left, I dug deeper into my story to be more real in Real Life. I didn’t share as much the first week, in hopes to care for my parents. I added more details and opened my story a little more. I struggled with my story. I struggled with the adjectives describing me. I was losing confidence in that is who I was, not am. It was as if I was facing the mirror and I didn’t like what I was seeing. To balance my time investment as the dining hall boss (busing/setting 6 meals a day), having campaigners with my work crew girls after we got a break (2 hours avg), and trying to find time to reflect on my mirror with Christ…I was starting to feel weak. I was realizing that I have scars from my past, some of them are still tender when I fall down, and others are open and healing. Christ was moving into my hiding place and it wasn’t all that comfortable.

We Worked hard...Played hard...and went DEEP

“Ooooohhhhh Assignments”… When I think about the last 3 weeks, which felt like 3 months- the infamous program team’s slogan, “Do Work!” seems like an understatement. I have never felt so emotionally/physically drained- after the first week of learning our job (dining hall boss), being invested in my parents week at Windy Gap, embracing my sweet group of high school girls on work crew (many talks late at night, tears, hugs, laugher and joy)…I felt completely given of myself. I gave to our team, I gave to my parents, I gave to my girls, I gave to my job, I gave to Real Life, I gave all I had to Christ through it all. Looking back I know I made it through on the strength of Christ…I swore by my prayers and Vitamin B-12. I come away with some incredible “themes” for my time on assignment.

“Emotional”

The first week of camp my emotions were at an all time high. My parents were truly falling in love with Young Life and I was praying that they were too falling in love with Jesus. It’s as if I have been my parents’ Young Life leader and the week at camp, I was handing over the reigns to adult guests and other members of our team to walk through the week conversationally with my parents. I was able to watch them from a far, embrace the gospel and struggle with the truth of their own brokenness. It was truly difficult to play my part with Real Life, as my parents watched. I remember hearing from another adult guest how my mom reacted to the adjectives that the campers used to describe who I was- “That’s my little girl up there.” Mom was reassured by, “Carol Lee is sacrificing herself because of who Christ is in her life and how much she wants others to know of His Love for them.” My dad came up to me later in the week, in tears telling me about the story in the Bible where Jesus told the disciples, “You will no longer be fishermen, but fishers of men.” He said he understood for the first time why I would leave the security of my job teaching to go on Young Life staff. I cried. I have for so long wanted my parents to understand and love what I do- now they do!

a step of faith

Getting on the bus this past week on our way to Sharp Top Cove, I met Blake. Blake took a smoke-break every time we stopped. When he was on the bus, he cussed and dipped. He quite possibly was the hardest kid I have met. He even fought tooth and nail to give up his cell phone. His leader chased after him all week. Blake didn't budge. Blake isolated himself, was mean to other campers, and the message of Christ wasn't having an outward affect on him. After Real Life, Blake in tears was questioning why his mother died when he was 12. I asked him, "What do you feel that you need from your mom that you can't have now?" He answered. I told him that Jesus wanted to be all that and more for him. Christ made his home in Blake's heart on the last day of camp. This picture was on the bus ride home. You can barely see Blake's face, but he is wearing a headlamp and reading "My first 30 Quiet Times" by Ty Saltsgiver. :) What a redemptive story of how God can reach out to the hardest of kids!

My time with my girls was amazing! I loved sitting with Chely, who just accepted Christ, Kayla and Katelyn- as we prayed for Cali to turn and trust Christ in her life. Then...Cali, turned and jumped into the arms of Christ only a few hours after we gathered to pray for her!

Ropes Course, heights, rapelling, climbing a 40 foot telephone to just jump off...conquering fears! I was able to be a part of these girls stepping out of their fears and also taking the leap of faith into a relationship with Christ or renewing it. What a privilege that I get to walk into the lives of my high school friends and share the love of a God that will conquer all their fears and deeply and furiously loves them.